F1 (Team) Fitty of the week. Rob Smedley

In a slight change to the F1 fitty proceedings.

I won't be concentrating on a driver this week.
And have decided to move slightly further a field. 

To instead, one of the most famous and probably the most fancied race engineer Formula One has ever had.

I am of course talking about the Northern God that is.
Rob Smedley.
(I can already feel some ovaries twitching even from here.)

Rob makes it on to the list for many, many reasons. 

(And it hasn't been the constant badgering from my followers on twitter. Honest)

The first smexy (Yes I put sexy and Smedley together) reason is of course.
SMEDLEY FM.

The one radio show we wished was on 24 hours a day.
It might be the sexy Northern accent.
It is the sexy Northern accent.
Phwoar. Smedley could read the phone book and I would want it on audio.
And it would probably sell better then 50 shades of Grey. True story.


Angry Smedley is a sexy Smedley...



Secondly.
It has to be the constant love story of Smedley and Massa.
A bromance that can even rival Brokeback Mountain.

I mean they even buy each other presents.
Muchos Love.

Thirdly.
It has to be Rob's consistent dedication to his charity work.
He holds fundraisers for the charity SANDS which supports Stillbirths and Neonatal deaths. After his wife Lucy lost their daughter Minnie in 2007.
For someone who travels the world pretty much every other weekend. To find the time to organise these events is pretty special.

So in short.
Pretty, funny, clever and Northern.
My kind of F1 fitty.
Hoorah.

You can also follow my ramblings on twitter @squiffany but to be honest. Don't expect the world.

Diary of a F1 weekend: Malaysia

So after an exciting Grand Prix weekend in Australia.
We hardly have time to blink before it's the turn of Malaysia and the start of another early morning race.

So expect blurred vision and tiredness throughout my weekend diary.

Thursday/Friday
2am

Hoorah. I am actually up ready for FP1 however it's fair to say I'm not feeling on top form.
I noticed that in the fly away races especially the back to back ones. My sleep patterns go completely awry.
Luckily I managed to stay awake for 45 minutes of FP1 before realising that I couldn't hang on.
So decided to go to bed and wake up instead for FP2.

Notes for FP1

• Karthikeyan gearbox decided to fail. 
• Hamilton should good pace to top the table
• Vettel showed that Red Bull didn't have the pace. 
• All the cars seemed to be close in terms of time. 
• #BOTTAS

Now instead of my alarm waking me up for FP2. It decided to let me sleep through.

So I missed all of FP2.
This is not the first time this has happened. Luckily I recorded FP2 for this very reason.

Notes for FP2

• More woe for Karthikeyan
• Vettel still struggling for pace in 10th
• Vergne and Ricciardo show their hand. Top ten placings for both. 
• Then Karthikeyan has some more woe thrown in. 
• Hamilton quickest again

Friday/Saturday

FP3.

Ahhh. So I missed all of FP3. 

This lately seems a F.F.F tradition. 

There is no excuse for this.

But of course I was up for Qualifying. (Because I'm good like that.)
And even though it was 5am and I had to go to Sheffield later in the day.
I managed to not sleep through it.
I think the pack of fig rolls I brought may of helped, along with the copious amounts of coffee.

Notes for Qualifying

• Bad starts for Heikki and Kimi with five place grid drops. 
• Massa still struggling for raw pace and dropping out in Q2
• Webber out qualifying Vettel again. 
• Schumacher qualifying in the top three.
• Hamilton and Button bagging a One-Two for Mclaren. 

Saturday/Sunday

Race day. 8am.

With my alarm clock actually waking me up. 

Even with the change of clocks. (Yes it gets lighter earlier but it meant a hour's less sleep. *Grumps*)

It was time to get my cup of coffee on the go, along with another pack of fig rolls. (I'm getting lardy because of this.)

Ready for another great race.

Now what I love about watching F1, is that comedy can come from nowhere.
Now I tweet has the race is on. So when 9 laps in the race the rain came down and the red flag came out.
So did best comedy moments.

All 50 minutes of non racing was filled with entertainment that consisted of Gazebo chat. 

Who had the best gazebo?

Who was doing the BBQ?

Why did HRT only have a Tesco carrier bag?

Then it turned into a scene from the Carry On films because we started perving on the wet drivers/team members. Ooo Matron. 

Then it came full circle back 2009 with a W.W.K.D.

Or the long version. 'What would Kimi do?'

We all secretly hoped he would get the ice cream back out. Sadly this was not to be. Even if Lotus did get the Ice Creams back out for him. 

Luckily the race did start back up again but under the safety car. 

When the safety car came back in. The fun could begin again.
And boy did it.
We had Button lose his front wing.
Then Vettel got a puncture. 

I may of had some micro naps between all of this going on.
But I managed to stay awake when the fight for the lead was between Ferrari and Sauber. (Words I didn't really expect to say this year.)

And even though Perez had a moment off track and couldn't catch Alonso back up.
It was worth me having Horner jiggly leg for.

It was pure racing at it's best.
F1 is definitely back and it has come back swinging. 

Notes for the race.

• Rain
• Red Flag
• Gazebo's are entertaining
• Grosjean failing in the race for the second week in a row. 
• Karthikeyan injuring several cars. 
• Pastor losing out on points on the last lap.
• Hamilton still not looking happy after another podium.
• Vettel coming up with a new insult system and raising a new finger. Twice.
• Button's brutal honesty
• The Perez and Alonso battle.

Today was a good day to be an F1 fan. 

Remember if you want to hear more of my F1 ramblings. You can also follow me on twitter @squiffany 

A letter to Ferrari

Dear Ferrari.

Ferrari this is no Dear John letter. That I promise you.
Call this a look into your future.

See many years ago. You were a top team. A great team. With the best driver and championships at your feet.
I never loved you, but secretly I always admired you and passion for being the best. Wanting to be the best.
Skip forward a few years and something has changed.
That something was that you decided not to grow up.

However your fans and followers have grown up. A lot.
We now carry smart phones, use twitter to communicate with Formula One drivers and we understand that the press. Although can be intruding, are an important part of F1 has a business.

Lately though you just seem to be having Kevin and Perry style tantrums about everything and anything lately and quite frankly it's starting to get a bit dull.

Especially this week.
When you acted up big time.

So when the internet passed rumours that Felipe Massa has/was being sacked. You decided instead of manning up and dealing with the problem head on.
You know a good old fashion press release or a quick press conference.
You thought that at the test at Barcelona, you would ban Felipe and Fernando from talking to the press. Especially the Spanish and Brazilian press.
Thus causing more of stir then if you dealt with the problem head on.

Sadly though I believed you wanted that to happen.
By not letting the drivers have a voice, you created a media storm. Thus insuring more press coverage at the test weekend then if you actually topped the time sheets.
Which you haven't done in a long time.

One day though I hope you can grow up, invest in a decent PR manager and start letting your drivers have a voice.
And finally focusing on the car again.
Becoming the team I remember so well in the noughties.
Becoming amazing.

Signed secretly.
Female Formula Fun.

Don't forget if you want to hear more F1 ramblings you can follow me on twitter @squiffany

Dance yourself dizzy..ish.

Since it's the F1 off season and not much seems to be going down in China town.
I thought I would mention the latest video's I have seen from Ferrari's Vrooom 2012.

Now lately what I love about F1 is when F1 teams have a party. The drivers really let their hair down.
So in honour of seeing drivers in different lights.
I thought I would compile the best of them.

This post focuses on the F1 dancers.
The ones who really know how to boogie.

Now Ferrari Vrooom 2012 produced it's own set of F1 dancers.
It might be more like line dancing but I enjoyed it.
(Don't tell my heart, my achy breaky heart....)


So whilst Mark Webber moves his hips in a undulating motion. I cry at the prospect that an F1 driver is better at dancing then me.


I'm no Inspector Columbo here but I suspect that this may not be Fernando Alonso dancing...


Now here is my all time favourite dancing driver.
It is of course. My Dad.
Nick Heidfeld.

Hit it Nick.


Just remember to always "Go Nick, go go go"

Now remember if your in a club and fancy hitting the moves.
Just copy your F1 dancers and dance like no one is watching.

(Warning: Your chances of pulling may decrease if you actually perform any of the moves seen above.)

To hear more F1 ramblings and uninteresting facts about my life. You can also follow me on twitter @squiffany