F1 Fitty of the week.

So after an interesting Monaco grand prix to say the least.

More on that later.

It's time for this week's F1 fitty of the week.

Now this week I have chosen someone who is a more... mature fitty.

He also knows how to swear, be funny and not be afraid to take the piss out of himself.

Well he is Australian after all. :)

Yes I am talking about Mark Webber.

(In a Mr Darcy moment here. Hubba hubba.)

Mark doesn't just take dips in pools.

He also organises charity treks and bike rides in Tasmania to help disadvantaged children.

Plus he parts owns a pub in England.

Pub landlord, charity worker and race driver.

What a combination.

Talking of a strange combination of talents. I said earlier that Mark like to take the piss out of himself.

Well then you need to see this.

Warning.

This is quite catchy.

So if you like a more older, wiser and more interesting F1 fitty.

Mark Webber is your man.

Diary of a F1 weekend: Monaco

So a better weekend F1 wise for me.

Not so good for some of the drivers.

Well many of the drivers.

So Friday...

Wait. Thursday.

So because Monaco has a national holiday on the Friday. Free practice one and two was on Thursday.

On Thursday I was getting a train to Manchester to meet my friend and have a night out.

So like normal I missed FP1 and FP2.

It turns out I missed several fires and a puddle.

First a truck fire before practice.

Then an OQN fire.

Then a puddle stops practice.

Who says F1 is boring?

Saturday

Now qualifying was a weird one.

Because my worst fear happened.

Now I struggle with big F1 crashes.

I usually cry.

This is because in all the time I have watched grand prix. No one has died.

I am terrified it is going to happen.

So has soon as a big accident occurs and the drivers don't move from or in the car.

I get upset. Really upset.

It happened in qualifying with Sergio Perez.

The bit that made me weep the most was in the slow motion camera replay.

You can see Sergio place his hands on his head has the wall comes closer. About 33 seconds into the clip.

Luckily after some time Sergio was released from the car suffering only a concussion and a bruised thigh. A very lucky man.

Sadly because of this. Sergio had to miss the grand prix but hopefully he will back in time for the Canadian GP.

Sunday

Well.

Where do I start.

I was glued to my telly box.

This race had everything.

Crashes, overtaking and Ali G?

Well I think I may have to do another blog post for that one.

But all I can say is that.

Even though Vettel won again.

This championship is by no means over.

Comments?

Just post below or message me on twitter @squiffany

Diary of a F1 weekend: Spain.

So this F1 weekend was really the weekend that everything went tits up.

It's also the reason why this diary is slightly later then planned.

A lot later.

In fact I should of just merged Spain to Monaco.

But here is my very late and very short diary of the Spanish weekend.

Friday

Like most weeks I was at work on Friday, So FP1 and Fp2 were both missed.

(Normally I would rant on but Saturday and Sunday were more interesting. You should read down to them. I would.)

Saturday.

Now I was at work for qualifying. Now I always come home and watch quali straight away. So I usually avoid twitter, facebook and the news. So that the results are well...Pure.

Well that accidentally got ruined by my work mate.

Who decided to text me that Webber got pole not knowing I was work.

Gutted.

(Don't worry he's promised not to do that to me again)

Sunday.

Ah well. I didn't get to watch much of the race. This was due to my little nephew Luca.

He's almost four and decided for some reason to just off the bannister. Sadly he landed funny and broke his arm in two places.

So whilst my nephew was going to the hospital.

I was in charge of looking after my niece Giorgia who is nearly 7.

Now Giorgia doesn't like F1.

It's boring.

So whilst I put Liar Liar on for her. In VHS no less. (Old school for the win)

She decided she didn't want me to watch F1 at all.

"Aunty Tiff I'm hungry"

"Aunty Tiff can I have a drink?"

"Aunty Tiffffffff"

Oh dear.

Well at least I knew who would win the race.

Saved me missing much.

So I'm hoping for a better weekend at one of my fave circuits.

Monaco.

My nieces and nephew. Crazy but I love them to bits.

Luca, Giorgia and Hope.

Have a great F1 weekend.

My eyes. My unprudish F1 eyes.

Well after an interesting F1 week. Where all my best F1 plans had quite literally gone to the dogs or in this case the hospital.

I was getting prepared for another F1 week until Monaco.

Then I decided to clear out some emails.

This was a bad move.

I found an email sent to me in 2006.

With a link called Things to come.

Now I knew it was something F1 related because of the person who sent it to me.

Now this email was technically some F1 fan fiction.

That is nothing bad until I read on.

Because it was f1 fan fiction with a twist.

More a man on man sexy twist.

It was basically slash porn.

Slash in jist is written fiction involving real life celebrities or TV show characters.

It usually involves people from the same sex.

I explain it in more detail here.

Now has promised in the video.

I am going to give you some snippets of "Things to come"

It involves Fernando Alonso and Kimi Raikkonen. (It was 2006)

(This photo may not be the best in hindsight)...In your end....do

Now I can't give you the really juicy stuff because I don't fancy getting banned from blogger anytime soon.

But if you are really desperate to read the more lewd version. I can email it you.

But here is the more interesting (Less rude) and slightly more wrong pieces of dialogue.

"Damn it, Kimi, stop playing around and unlock the bloody cuffs. What if Ron or someone else finds me," Fernando spluttered.

"That doesn't mean I'm not going to punish you. I'm still annoyed with you for cutting off all your lovely hair."

Fernando looked up at Kimi, "You'll enjoy me coming from behind ... to win."

The atmosphere thick with promise, Kimi stared into Fernando's laughing eyes and slowly raised the zip over taut white cotton.

My eyes still haven't recovered.

My mouth still can't stop laughing.

I need to know if this is still going on 2011.

Who is classed has F1 slash totty these days?

Well especially now that Kimi is gone....

So thoughts/views and opinions really welcome.

I am sorry that it's a more ruder post this week.

Even the most depraved F1 subjects have to be tackled at some point.

So you can comment below or on the youtube video.

You can also message me at squiffany87@gmail.com or on twitter @squiffany.

Who knew that Formula One and beauty could be linked?

Hello.

Hope your all well :)

Earlier today I received a link to a website. That actually made my day.

Now has some of my FFF readers know. I also run a beauty blog along side FFF called Get your glitter out.

It's here if you want to have a look.

http://getyourglitterout.blogspot.com

Now I never thought that I would really be ever be able to link the two together.

Mainly because Beauty and Formula One don't go hand in hand.

Until today.

Because it turns out that a semi-famous make up artist has let slip who are some of his more regular male clients.

Turns out F1 and Beauty do have a link. Hoorah :)

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/woman/fashion/beauty/3586434/Steven-Gerrard-Jenson-Button-and-Jonny-Wilkinson-all-wear-make-up.html?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter

Now considering that most F1 drivers are in the public eye. I'm not too fussed that they wear a bit of concealer or cover up. Everyone wants to look as best as they can.

But if F1 drivers start matching their eyeshadow to the their race suit.

Then I may be worried.

Then that's the time beauty and F1 shouldn't mix.

F1 Fitty of the week.

So after the beautiful blue eyed F1 fitty of last week.

That was Jerome D'Ambrosio.

I decided to stick to what I know and produces you another beautiful blue eyed F1 fitty.

In Jaime Alguersuari.

Yes that's Jaime. Not Jamie.

It's pronounced Hi-me. (God Spanish is a sexy language)

PHWOAR indeedy. :)

This Spanish fitty is also the youngest driver on the grid.

At just twenty one.

But in these twenty one years Jaime already has two vocations in life.

He's not just an F1 driver for Toro Rosso.

Oh no.

Jaime is also a top DJ in Spain.

This boy is a man of many talents.

So next time you think fit F1 drivers just go round and round a track.

Sometimes they do.

Literally.

The gossip that isn't going away.

So after I wrote about this on Wednesday.

http://femaleformulafun.blogspot.com/2011/05/gossip-i-dont-want-to-go-away.html

I thought I should do a quick update on what has occurred since then.

Now I said I didn't want this story to die. Mainly because of how serious the claims were and mainly because there was still a lot of unanswered questions.

Like.

What actually happened?

What was said that caused the "Unintentional" accident?

What injuries did Eric Lux suffer?

And finally what's going to happen with this story?

So the details on this story still aren't clear but from what we roughly know.

We know that Eric Lux was injured by a champagne glass. Causing him to need stitches in his neck.

We still don't know what provoked this attack from Sutil.

But we do know that Eric Lux has filed charges for assault against Adrian Sutil. Not in China but in France. (That's complicated in itself)

The full story is here on this French website.

http://www.sport24.com/auto-moto/formule-1/actualites/eric-lux-attaque-adrian-sutil-en-justice-474734/

So since the story broke out today of criminal proceedings. Twitter and F1 website have gone mad.

I told you in the earlier post I wouldn't let the story drop. Yet it's taken nearly a week for the story to really hit big.

Seems like violence ain't a big story in the F1 world, so long has you drive well around a track.

But now it is finally out there. Thankfully.

One vital question remains.

What is going to happen to Adrian Sutil and his career?

Sadly no one knows the answer.

Mainly because we (F1 fans) don't have all the facts.

Because as much has we can be the jury. Only the court can give the verdict.

Until then Sutil's career is pretty much limbo.

Along with his reputation.

All I know is that this story needs a resolution and soon.

For the victims, the accused, the teams and the fans alike.

Comments?

Just post below or follow me on twitter @squiffany

The gossip I don't want to go away.

So a few days ago word was spread of a scuffle between Force India driver Adrian Sutil and McLaren driver Lewis Hamilton in a bar in China.

Nothing more was said really which left me and I'm sure a few other F1 fans slightly confused as to what actually occured.

Well today came the confirmation we needed.

442race.com got the exclusive. Has you can see here.

http://www.422race.com/2011/esclusivo-rissa-in-cina-tra-sutil-e-un-boss-renault/

But I will post the jist. (This was translated from Italian to English, so there might be a few spelling and grammar mistakes. Just like all my blog posts)

422race.com is now able to reveal the details of the event: the person involved in the brawl with the Force India driver is Eric Lux, the number two of Genii Capital, an investment fund that owns the Lotus team Renault GP and the right arm of team president Gerard Lopez. Observers have noted in the paddock several wounds on the throat of Lux at the last weekend in Istanbul and a team spokesman confirmed the incident.

"I can confirm that on the evening of Sunday after the Grand Prix there was an incident involving Eric Lux, Capital of the Genii," he told 422race.com. "Lotus Renault GP, however, not in a position to make any comment because it is a private matter between Eric and the other person. " And the other person to whom the spokesperson refers to, but being very careful not to name it, it's Adrian Sutil.

The brawl happened at the club M1NT Sunday night. Some people have noticed this in a hurry Lux make their way through the crowd coming out of a private with his neck bleeding and frightened expression. Seconds later, Lewis Hamilton emerged from the same small room, surrounded by his bodyguards. Our sources have not been able to confirm if his friend Adrian Sutil was with him but after a few seconds, entering the same VIP room, there was no sign of him.

Nothing is known about the reasons for the punch, even if Sutil would have run away from China shortly after to avoid legal problems in this regard. An official spokesman for the FIA, however, confirmed to 422race.com that the Federation is investigating the matter and that no action will be taken on in respect of Sutil. A substantial "no comment" even by the Force India, who have declared our microphones through a spokesman: "It 's a private matter between the parties involved and we have no information on it, so we do not intend to make any comment."

So Lewis wasn't the one in the fight at all. He just happened to be in the same room. (We all know Sutil and Hamilton are really good friends off track.)

It was this man. Eric Lux

So the teams aren't commenting on this. The FIA isn't getting involved and all we get is this statement from Adrian, which doesn't tell us much.

Firstly it has everything to do with Formula One.

Secondly how do you "Unintentionally" hit someone anyway?

So with a million questions unanswered. That apparently it.

But it definitely shouldn't be.

This can't be allowed to be forgotten. Not at least until we know all the facts has to why Sutil "Unintentionally" hit Eric Lux

All Formula One drivers have a right to a private life, this I agree on but these guys are role models to so many people. They shouldn't be allowed to get away with this kind of behaviour in public. If I "Unintentionally" hit someone. I could easily be done on an assault charge in the UK. Just because this happened in China,it makes no difference. A sorry by Sutil doesn't cover it, not by any stretch.

So until a proper reason breaks though for why this incident occurred. I promise to keep this in the public eye. Violence, doesn't solve anything and violence shouldn't be in Formula One. Full Stop.

The missing screensaver in my life

So Female Formula Fun readers.

I need your help.

A few weeks ago. I lost all my files on my computer due to a lovely virus. (Caused by a link related to HRT no less)

So since then I have had no screen saver picture. This is not a huge problem I know but I now know which picture should be on this small piece of space.

This however is where the problem lies.

I can't find it or a link to it even.

This F1 picture did the rounds on twitter a few months ago but since then my cries to find it have not been heard.

The picture is of Nick Heidfeld (OQN) and Robert Kubica from the the BMW Sauber days. Doing some promotional work sitting at a table with a spread of food (I think in some European country) and OQN is holding the most tiniest flag I have ever seen.

This might not sound like a photograph of epic proportions but it made me laugh a lot and it is just the cheery picture that my laptop needs.

I also attempted a picture just for you.

(Yes I'm 23 and I draw like my 4 year old niece. Art wasn't my strong point. Sadly)

So if you can help me. With a link or the picture. Then I would be eternally grateful.

Then you can either comment below or follow me on twitter @squiffany.

F1 Fitty of the week.

This week's fitty of the week. I would normally of missed.

Mainly because they don't feature heavily in the F1 coverage, due to slightly languishing at the back of the grid.

But I accidentally caught his big blue eyes at the Turkish GP qualifying and WOW.

Aren't we missing a treat.

So lets put a back marker firmly at the fore front,

I introduce to you.

Jerome D'Ambrosio.

This Belgian also goes by the nickname of Custard at Virgin racing because of his Surname. (British people will get that pants reference)

Now Belgium may of only brought us chocolate and Jean Claude Van Damme.

But they can add this little beauty to the small but perfectly formed list.

So next time you watch Formula One. Don't forget to look at the back of the grid.
You may miss a beauty.

The finger that made me fall out of love with Sebastian Vettel.

My mum is a woman of many quotes.

Classic lines of advice such has...

"If you get attacked by a man, kick him in the bollocks and run"

and not forgetting

"Never trust a man with brown shoes"

One of my other pieces of mum advice is.

"Never be too cocky when your at the top, because there is always someone out there that is better then you."

That sentence seems extremely app when talking about Sebastian Vettel.

Now a couple of years ago I did like Seb. He was funny, loved talking to the media (A slight rarity in F1 these days) and he was pretty decent looking too (Always a win for a young female.)

At BMW there was no doubting his talent. This kid is special.

Then in the first half of his first full season at Toro Rosso. People forgot that at one point Sebastien Bourdais was actually a little bit better then him.

But all that changed at the infamous 2008 Monza race.

Where in a slightly poor Toro Rosso and in the rain to boot.

Vettel won his first race.

A star really was born and within the year was signed with Red Bull.

Now in 2009 Red Bull were still over shadowed by a better team. (In this case Brawn) and Vettel was to me still likeable but still had what I called the gift.

The gift to be quick, clever and above modest.

Then this time last year.

I fall out of love with Vettel.

Turkey 2010.

The infamous Team mate clash.

Now it wasn't the fact Vettel blamed Webber because drivers can only see what they see. Not like us with our TV's and multi camera angles.

It was the way he acted afterwards.

Like a spoilt brat.

Hugging Christian Horner and acting like my four year old nephew.

It was too much for me.

My love for him was dying.

The tipping point though came a few races later.

When the wins came at the end of last season. We started to see the Vettel finger.

This was all good at first. Every driver like to do a celebration when they win a race. In Fernando Alonso's championship year. He stood on his car and did a pose representing the country he won in.

That at least was a little different.

But Vettel and his finger are just bloody annoying and the radio message.

"That's what I'm talking about"

Actually sends my twitter mad every race weekend.

Because the one thing that bores an F1 fan to death is repetitiveness.

(We all remember the Michael Schumacher seasons.)

Sebastian Vettel now is that Repetitiveness.

Now some people are going to say I'm just jealous because he is winning all the time.

I promise you that's not the case.

Jenson Button won a stream of races last year and I still like the guy.

Jenson was smug... don't get me wrong there. But Jenson followed my mum's philosophy.

He knew there would always be someone better round the corner and in interviews he always says. "So-so did a great job today, we didn't"

A bit of humbleness doesn't hurt an F1 career.

So Mr Vettel.

You need to get a new celebration and listen to my mother.

Because she ain't ever wrong. Fact.

Like this rant/post. Click the follow button blog button on the right hand side. Or you can follow me on twitter @squiffany.

Diary of F1 weekend: Turkey

So Turkey this weekend.

One of the more interesting tracks. Mainly for the fact that if you say your going to the Turkish grand prix. Your easily spotted in the crowd because normally... there is no crowd.

But it's also the scene of the aftermath of a three week Formula One break.

So now I have bored you slightly with a bit of guff, here's my diary of an F1 weekend.

Friday.

Now I was at work on Friday afternoon but with FP1 on at 8am. My usual habit would be to watch FP1 and then miss FP2 to go to work but... on Friday night I was going out. So I spent my Friday morning trying to find my outfit and get everything prepared ready for the one hour timeslot I had to get dressed and back out the door in.

Although I did manage to see Vettel's crash in the rain though. Only because my twitter feed was ready prepared with a Vettel crash video. So I got to watch it on the bus. Mobile technology for the win there.

Saturday.

Again work made me miss qualifying but thanks to the red button. I watched it all just an hour later. So I wasn't as far behind as normal. Qualifying didn't throw up much really. The main news was that Kamui Kobayashi's car failed and so was at the back of the grid for the race. This piece of information alone made the anticipation of the Turkish race more exciting.

Because has anyone who watches F1 knows, Kamui Kobayashi is the master of the overtake and with 23 cars to overtake.

That's a race in itself, never mind the front runners of Red Bull and McLaren.

Sunday

So I'm off today and in even better news because the Turkish race is actually at a decent hour of 1pm. I actually get a lie in. Double result.

Like China three weeks ago. The Turkish GP was a great dry race. Lots of overtaking (Especially by Mr Kobayashi), team mate rivalry and dodgy pit stops (I'm talking to you Ferrari and McLaren)

The things that made the race personally great for me have to be.

• Martin Brundle talking Toblerone etiquette (I didn't even think there was any) with Sebastian Vettel pre race.
• EJ moaning that the overtaking because it was easy made the race dull. That man really needs new glasses or a nap.
• OQN and Petrov fighting for dominance in the Renault team
• The pit stop incidents. It just shows one small mistake can really cost you places
• And Michael Schumacher pretty much showing he is actually related to Ralf. Bad times.

So in two weeks we're off to Spain. Alonso country.

It's usually the place where all the upgrades come on to all the cars.

Can anyone make any improvements to really catch Vettel?

Who knows, but I know it's going to be unmissable.

Like this post. Then you can follow this blog. Just click on the right hand side of the page or you can follow me on twitter @squiffany

F1 Fitty of the week.

So with the grand prix looming ever closer.

Thank god. It's about time.

I thought it was the perfect time for another F1 Fitty of the week.

This I'm going to be very patriotic about it.

*Drum roll*

He's British.

He used to be stuck in quite frankly crap cars and he made bad team decisions.

He's British.

He promotes Shampoo in poorly acted adverts.

He's british.

Oh and he used to be world champion.

Did I mention that he's British?

Anyway. It's Jenson Button.

One time Heat Torso of the week.

(I should know. It's stuck on my wall.)

One time bad actor and free of any dandruff promoting.

(My fave bit is where he beats the kid at the game and just shouts winning. Oscar winning gold there)

But also racing driver and pure fitty.

It really does make Sunday morning worth getting up for.

By the way.

Did I mention he is British?

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